Car Lust

1966-77 Ford Bronco and Bronco II

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. I refer to the brief period during which I owned a Ford Bronco II. Now, I will readily admit that the Bronco II does not, shall we say, have a sterling reputation, probably about on par historically with its II-suffixed cousin the Mustang II. And it certainly didn't worm its way into my heart by breaking down 500 miles from home in the middle of Oregon and causing me to leave it there with a dead engine. In fact, I do find it rather difficult to defend in great depth which is, partly, why this post lumps it in with the original Bronco.

But they share a common heritage and design philosophy that seems to keep cropping up: the small, fairly utilitarian sport utility vehicle. . .with an emphasis on the utility. The original Bronco has achieved something of a cult status--a perennial favorite here at Car Lust--and it also represents  some of the cultural and market factors that were going on at its introduction and says something about the modern SUV  and its many  manifestations.

That and both really look cool.

RIP, Isuzu

As Rob the SVX Guy mentioned in another post today, Isuzu will leave the U.S. passenger car market at the end of the month. Isuzu will continue to provide parts and service for cars already on the road and will still be in the U.S. market with its thriving commercial truck business. But, for the first time since 1981, Isuzu will no longer be an option on the new car market.

This news isn't a surprise; Isuzu announced its withdrawal last year, and the writing was on the wall well before then. As Rob has pointed out, Isuzu hasn't been particularly relevant for some time, so it's difficult to get too exercised about its demise here. After all, the Isuzu name basically died here when it was relegated to use only on rebadged GM SUVs.

Still, I will miss Isuzu. It's never nice to lose a brand, and Isuzu gave us some memorable moments over the years. Here are the things I'll remember about Isuzu:

Isuzu Impulse RS

After hearing the news that Isuzu is leaving the North American market, my first instinct was to shrug it off.   I mean, really, who cares? Isuzu hasn't produced anything worth remembering or lusting after in quite a while, and its withdrawal really isn't a big deal in the automotive world; especially compared to other news. 

However, even companies as boring and derivative as Isuzu occasionally still make wonderful vehicles, and to bid Isuzu farewell I thought it necessary to write a Car Lust about one of the greatest hot hatches ever--the Isuzu Impulse RS.

Suzuki Aerio

Some time ago, a co-worker mentioned to me that Car Lust, while intermittently entertaining, isn't particularly useful in helping everyday drivers find good, inexpensive modern cars. I nearly recoiled in shock. After all, the Fiat X1/9 and AMC Eagle are perfect cars for today's families.

Of course, he's right. I drone on a great deal about old cars and expensive new cars, but of the recent crop of inexpensive cars only the Kia Spectra5 has received any love--and that was tepid love at best. "Well, fair enough," I told my co-worker. "How about the Suzuki Aerio?" At this point, he gave me a look of sickened disbelief and walked rapidly in the other direction. I get that a lot.

Nobody who has paid attention to this blog in the last 18 months should be at all surprised that I like the Aerio. It's an inexpensive and useful family hauler, and the very characteristics that caused it to fizzle in the American market cause me to love it. America hates hatchbacks; I love them, and if they are hunchbacked, all-wheel-drive, and quirky, so much the better.

1966-1967 Mercury Comet

Okay, you're going to need to sit down, take a few deep breaths, and steel yourselves. I have something shocking to say, and you're going to need every bit of fortitude you can muster just to cope with it. Are you ready?

Okay, here goes: Mercury used to make interesting cars.

Pardon me for blowing your mind. I know we've all become used to seeing a Mercury lineup stocked exclusively with somnolent, chrome-laden, and drearily redundant Ford clones. Mercury is most remarkable for its application of pretty cool names to vehicles that have no particular reason to exist. In an era in which way too many cars are named alphanumerically, Mercury actually bothers to give its cars evocative names. Milan, Mariner, Sable, Mountaineer--these are all great car names, but it's a shame that they are wasted on cars that bring nothing unique to the vehicular world.

1986-1992 Saab 9000 Turbo

When Saab debuted the 9000 in 1986, it raised some eyebrows. It's not often that a car garners attention because of its normalcy; but such is the case when a noted oddball carmaker like Saab introduces a car so seemingly bone-stock conventional as the 9000.

Saab had always been known for cars with profiles that could best be described as quirky. From the early 92 and 95, to the swoopy Sonnetts, to the swollen and hunchbacked 99 and 900, Saabs looked different than normal cars and were seemingly proud of that fact. By contrast, the 9000 was clean and attractive but otherwise unremarkable by the standards of 1986. The aero headlights and the smoothly contoured sides were handsome and aerodynamic, but reminiscent of the ground-breaking Audi 5000 and Ford Taurus. Without the Saab grille and insignia, it would be difficult to identify the 9000 as a Saab--while the 900, on the other hand, showed its Saab heritage clearly and proudly. Only the five-door hatchback bodystyle betrayed Saab's quirky tendencies.

In another break from non-conformity, the 9000's platform was the result of a joint development effort with three other European carmakers. The 9000's chassis and, in some cases, body panels, were shared with the Alfa Romeo 164, Lancia Thema, and Fiat Croma. Sharing a platform with the likes of Alfa and Lancia doesn't exactly raise the spectre of awful and irrelevant clones like the Cadillac Cimmaron or Mercury Bobcat, but its conventionality was a bit worrying for this slavish Saab-ite. Had Saab sold out and built a bland every-car?

Merry Christmas from Car Lust

Dodge Tomahawk

It looks like a motorcycle. It sounds like a supercar. It's not street legal in the US. You could, if you had one, only drive it on private roads or on a track. And you could do so at high speeds.

Very high speeds.

It's got 500 horsepower. It goes from 0 to 60 in 2.5 seconds. It has a theoretical top speed of over 400 miles an hour. And you can actually steer it.

And you could, at one time, actually buy one.

1974 AMC Matador Oleg Cassini

The AMC Matador is a particular favorite of mine--I have both sung its praises and defended its honor from those who would impugn it.

After the most recent Matador post, reader Gary Thoreson dropped me an e-mail describing his Matador. It's the prettiest Matador I've ever seen, bar none, and the story behind the car is truly touching.

Here's Gary's story:

Submitted by Gary Thoreson

It was Feb. 19, 1999 in Abbotsford, B.C., and my Dad, Edwin Alberta Thoreson, became the proud owner of a 1974 Oleg Cassini Matador. The past owner, according to the transfer papers, was a man by the name of Henry Edge. The transfer papers had also stated the car was white in color. I believe this was the original color, but since then it had undergone a complete color change and was now green. The original gold vinyl top had been repainted white, but the front grille and base color for the hub caps were still gold--that didn't match too well with the green.

1962: It was a very good year

I take this opportunity to sing the praises of not one car, but many: those from a single year, 1962. Why this particular year? I can almost hear the thoughts of many out there wondering why this year and not some other one that has way more hot cars. What about '69 when we had Super Bees and Boss 302s? Or maybe 1964, which saw both the GTO and the Mustang debut? To these criticisms I can only respond: Hey, this is Car Lust, after all.

But I have my reasons, some of them carefully reasoned and others a bit more self-referential. I will admit right up front that this was the same annus incredibilis that saw the introduction of the Cagle Mark III model (that would be your humble blogger), but that's actually secondary and is good only as an additional plot device to the larger point which I came to by other avenues. In truth, I'd been gravitating towards the general 1961-63 era for some time, an interest initially sparked by a single event in automotive history (below the fold).

The upshot is that I find the cars produced in the period between what we think of as 1950s classics and the muscle car era of the later '60s to be terribly attractive in their own transitional way. In a lot of ways they seem to capture that moment between the staid '50s and the free-for-all '60s that, in some sense, reflects on how society (or at least society as presented by the media) looked at the time. After the gray flannel suit, but before bell bottoms, if you will.

1977 Buick Nighthawk

It was love at first sight. 

There I was, reading The Truth About Cars instead of doing something work-related, when, lo and behold, they pushed out a capsule review of the 1977 Buick Nighthawk. I was immediately smitten; I fell head over heels.

The black paint. ... The gold hawk and the gigantic stripe on the side. ... The gold wheels. ... Those lines, evocative of a mutant offspring between a Datsun 240Z and an AMC Pacer... or was that an RX-7 crossbred with a Pinto? I couldn't decide, but it didn't matter. Is that a clam-like rear taillight? Why yes. Yes it is. Is it winking at me suggestively? Why yes. I think it is.

Then I was told about the paint.

Jeep Grand Cherokee SRT8

Nothing about the Jeep Grand Cherokee SRT8 makes any kind of sense. Aside from the insane incongruity of a  420-horsepower Jeep, the whole idea of a high-performance SUV is almost entirely nonsensical.

Compared to cars, sport-utility vehicles have certain advantages--increased cargo-carrying capacity, off-road ability, and the visibility provided by a high-seating position. The inevitable trade-off is a set of dynamic compromises that militate against performance. SUVs tend to be heavier, tipper, and far less aerodynamic than their more car-like stablemates. This goes double for Jeeps, which have admirably retained the off-road prowess that made the brand famous--even as other automakers have emasculated their SUVs' off-road abilities.

So why take a perfectly good Jeep Grand Cherokee and make a hot rod out of it? Especially when by so doing you drop its ride height and cripple the off-road and towing abilities that make it special? Basically, what you have left is an SUV that has plenty of S but no U.

Daihatsu Naked

Today's topic of interest is one of those fascinating little kei cars found in the Japanese home market. A kei car cannot exceed certain exterior dimensions, and is limited to a 660cc motor of no more than 64 HP. A car which observes these limitations is easier to register under Japanese law and qualifies for favorable tax and insurance treatment.

Our subject was produced by Toyota subsidiary Daihatsu from 2000 to 2004, and is a variation on the 5th-generation Mira 5-door hatchback. It has a squared-off shape, and the many "industrial" details like the chiseled character lines on the doors, the "bolt heads" on the bumper and nosepiece, and the exposed door hinges, give it a "techno" or "futuristic" feeling. If they'd had four-passenger economy cars in Blade Runner, they might've looked like this little fella.

The name of this delightful little car? We'll get to that in a minute.

1985 Honda Civic CRX

Perfect.

If I had to describe my blue 1985 Civic CRX in one word, that would be it.

I bought it sight-unseen from a dealer my father knew. I took delivery one Saturday morning and drove to my parents' house to show it to Mom and my sister, taking the shortcut through the park so I could play with my new toy on the twisty part in the gorge between the old mill and the goldfish pond.

By the time I got to the house, I was thinking to myself, "This is perfect!  It's like Honda read my mind. Someone finally built the car I've always wanted!"

That CRX was perfect. Completely, absolutely perfect. The most perfect car I had ever owned, driven, ridden in, or even looked at from ten yards away.

Let me explain what made it so perfect.

Quantum of Annoyance--When Product Placement Goes Horribly Wrong

My wife and I watched the new James Bond film Quantum of Solace a week or so ago and thoroughly enjoyed it. As you might guess from my frequent references to Bond, I am a fan of the franchise--and while I occasionally miss the humor and campiness of the Roger Moore movies, I overwhelmingly approve of the franchise reboot. The series badly needed more realistic villains and a darker, more dangerous Bond, and the last two movies have delivered.

As good as Quantum of Solace was, though, all of its goodness was nearly unraveled by Ford's product placement whitewash. It didn't start out badly--the movie began with a thrilling car chase that featured Bond piloting a gorgeous Aston Martin. Even setting aside from Bond's history with the marque, Aston Martin is the perfect Bond car--muscular, debonair, slightly threatening, and thoroughly English. Aside from the fact that the company is owned by Ford, of course. (EDIT: Partially owned by Ford, that is. Ford sold all but a small stake last year. Thanks to the commenters for reminding me--I thought Ford still had a bigger stake.)

Likewise, I could buy that Bond would drive a Land Rover--it is a believable Bond vehicle, especially for off-road situations. Again, Land Rover is a Ford property. I even enjoyed the novelty of seeing a motorcycle chasing down an electric subcompact--a electric subcompact Ford Ka, naturally. 

Mercury Marauder

The images that leap to mind when most people hear the words "muscle car" are generally not "business suit" or "family man" or "middle manager". The association is generally more along the lines of "t-shirt" or "gearhead" or "line worker." It makes sense, as the classic muscle car era is usually assigned to the time between the introduction of the GTO in 1964 and somewhere in the early 1970s when the last of the great big block, high compression V-8s rolled off the assembly line.

Like the GTO, most classic muscle cars followed a familiar pattern: take a cheap base model coupe, strip it down to its essentials, squeeze in as big an engine as possible, and make enough aftermarket performance parts to allow the average mechanically inclined 20-something to turn it into a quarter-mile monster.

But when the concept of the muscle car began to take shape in the late '50s (some would argue earlier; these 'origins' discussions can be tricky), it had much different connotations. Power went with luxury, and was only rightfully available to those who could afford both. Before Goats and Judges and Chargers and Super Sports prowled the streets, the kings of the power hill were 300s, Galaxies, and Impalas: big, heavy 4-door sedans with options and comfort galore. To drive one of these meant you'd made it; you could afford not only power but all of the high-end doodads that manufacturers had to offer. Power and prestige went hand in hand. Yes, before those miserable upstarts came along, the Big Cars ruled the power roost and everybody knew it.

But alas, physics being what it is, power-to-weight ratios eventually won the day and the big luxurious muscle cars largely went the way of the dodo. Almost. Throughout the years, at least one manufacturer kept the old concept alive, if only in short bursts. And so I give you the Mercury Marauder: the thinking man's muscle car.

1977 Pontiac Trans Am SE

Sally Field: "Does this thing move?"
Burt Reynolds: "Oh, yeah."

---

Like Smokey and the Bandit, the movie that made it famous, the 1977 Pontiac Trans Am is easy to dismiss as a buffoonish, overblown mockery of a once-great art form. Certainly both the movie and the muscle car are obvious, gauche, and deeply imbued with the cheesiness characteristic of the 1970s. Personally, I think that is at the root of their appeal.

Last year I wrote a series of posts on Poseur Muscle Cars, honoring such punchless extroverts as the Ford Mustang II, Chevy Monte Carlo SS, Dodge Magnum XE, Ford Gran Torino, and Spirit-based AMC AMX. The '77 Trans Am would seem like an obvious candidate for Poseur Muscle Car (dis)honor--after all, as the Trans Am's horsepower ratings sagged in the mid-1970s, the body kits and graphics kept getting flashier and gaudier to compensate.

The difference? The Trans Am was the real thing--the car most of those poseur muscle cars wanted to be when they grew up. Compared to its contemporaries, the Trans Am was still a potent car. Relatively speaking, it still brought the thunder.

Childhood Car Memories

Car Lust is about our emotional connection to the automobiles in our lives. Over the course of our writings, we've shared a few misty memories of the cars we saw and rode in when we were small (for example, here, here, here, and here).

Now it's your turn.

What are your earliest automotive memories? Hit the "comments" button and let us know.

--Cookie the Dog's Owner

10 Cars That Damaged GM's Reputation

Popular Mechanics recently released a list of 10 cars that they felt damaged GM's reputation. It's hard to argue about most of their choices, but since we've already established ourselves as a vanguard of poor taste and questionable automotive judgment, I felt it was important that we briefly review our feelings on some of these cars and remind everyone that, yet again, we have no taste or shame.

Hudson Hornet

The Hudson Motor Car Company merged with Nash-Kelvinator in 1954 to form American Motors, and the Hudson nameplate disappeared from the marketplace completely after the 1957 model year. Half a century later, few people other than old car buffs were even aware that there had once been a Hudson Motor Car Company--until they saw the character of Doc Hudson in the 2006 Pixar film Cars.

While Cars is a fantasy, the character of Doc Hudson is firmly grounded in real life. There really was a Fabulous Hudson Hornet that dominated stock car racing in the early 1950s and won three straight championships.

Even off the racetrack, the 1951-54 Hudson Hornet was pretty fabulous.

Insufferable Blasphemy!

Since I have already set the precedent of responding to online articles in a completely un-timely way, I may as well respond to the Vehix.com article "Prepare to Get Scared: Top Ten Ugliest Cars in American History." The article ran more than a month ago, so I obviously have my finger firmly on the pulse of the automotive blogosphere.

Author Nathan Adlen does a nice job in producing a well-written riff on pretty familiar theme. Bashing ugly, terrible, and generally unpopular cars is fertile ground for a writer. I have read a bunch of articles on the subject over the years, and I own a few books that do the same--despite my bias towards defending bad cars, these books and articles are usually good for a few good chuckles. And, of course, if taking easy potshots at bad cars is a crime, I'm guilty. Adlen's piece is little different from that standpoint. It's witty, and he gets in some well-turned phrases. No, my beef is with his choice of cars.

Nice Audi R8 ...

... except it's actually a Ford Probe. Yes, really--take a look. If you take a minute to really look, you can see it in the proportions and the wheels. The interior picture is a dead giveaway.

I don't often say this about kit cars, but this actually looks really good--there's something about the flowing rear that really works. For the sake of the proud driver, I hope it's a Probe Turbo--I can imagine Audi purists tarring and feathering those responsible for this sacrilege.

--Chris H.

Subaru WRX STi 22B

To a logical and fair observer, the United States seems like a great place for automotive enthusiasts.  Compared to the rest of the world, we are fortunate to have long stretches of fantastic, sparsely populated driving roads; cheap and plentiful gasoline (for now, at least); decent rural speed limits; and of course muscle cars. Most enthusiasts, however, cannot be accused of being logical or fair on this topic. You see, the vast majority of us have felt the sting of longing for a car that, for whatever reason, is not available in the U.S. And if I can speak for the rest of the sufferers, this experience is completely maddening.

Enthusiasts across this otherwise-great country have felt the heartbreak from unrequited love for unavailable supercars, higher-horsepower derivatives of otherwise accessible cars, Kei cars, Australian muscle cars, and even European Fords. I speak from experience, because I have desired all of these.

Longing for the unattainable isn't particularly novel with any form of lust, of course--if anything, it increases the frenzy. Such was the case for me with the Subaru WRX STi 22B--a car so incredibly desirable and so completely unavailable that it nearly drove me insane in 1998.

Chrysler LeBaron Coupe/Convertible

When discussing the topic of government bailing out struggling American automakers, the mind turns naturally to Chrysler. After all, the smallest of the Big Three famously received $1.5 billion from the government in loan guarantees in 1979. Powered by Lee Iacocca's charisma, a solid if unspectacular small car platform (the ubiquitous K-car), and brisk sales from its innovative minivan, Chrysler managed to survive and even thrive in the 1990s.

In the 1980s and early 1990s, Chrysler tinkered with the K-car platform and the equally ubiquitous 2.2-liter four-cylinder engine like a small child tinkers with Legos--crafting endless combinations of disparate creations from essentially the same set of parts. As with the kid with the Legos, some of the results were wonderful--and some weren't. But only one was truly beautiful--the LeBaron.

I can hear the snickering already, so let me clarify--after all, as Oldsmobile did with "Cutlass," Chrysler throws the LeBaron moniker around with wild abandon. I'm not talking about the Dodge Diplomat clone (though that's a pretty wagon), the Dodge Aries clone, or the Dodge Lancer sports sedan clone (certainly a future Car Lust in its own right). No, I'm talking about the Chrysler-specific personal luxury coupe that debuted in 1987 and broke new ground with its smooth, stylish lines.

Now the snickers are turning into belly laughs--that's fine, laugh it up. Those of us with more refined tastes will be cruising around in our LeBarons.

Bailout Challenge

We periodically run challenges here at Car Lust--for example, we have challenged readers to identify the most interesting used car available for less than $5,000 (challenge, results), the most interesting used car for less than $25,000 (challenge, results), and the best first car for a teenager (challenge, results). This time I'm going to take a slightly different tack.

My boss and I were discussing the potential bailout for the struggling American automotive industry this morning, and we agreed that if the automakers are going to request help from taxpayers, the taxpayers should have the right to make that help contingent on the automakers changing how they do business. After all, it makes little sense to throw billions of taxpayer dollars into what appears at the moment to be a broken business model.

So, assuming you could present a list of take-it-or-leave-it conditions to the automakers, what would they be? Silly, serious, semi-serious--it doesn't matter, I want to hear your suggestions. I would only ask that the discussion not get partisan--remember the comment guidelines and be respectful of each other, or I will need to shut down comments and suspend the challenge.

My thoughts in the comments section.

--Chris H.