Used-Car Listing of the Day
I like this ad for a 1972 Gran Torino wagon, especially the first sentence and the last line:
"Everything has started to rust. Most of the rust fortunately is the bolts that hold everything that needs replacing.
The rear shocks are totally gone. Just the center support rod for each one is all that's left.
I can't remove the right rear brake drum to repair and put on new shoes.
The radiator support frame is rusting out from under it.
Battery holder box is gone, (rust).
The AM radio works, but needs a new speaker.
The driver's side wiper is in serious need of replacement.
The heater fan motor doesn't work either.
All the rubber gaskets around the doors are shrinking. Not coming loose, just kind of shrinking. I know it sounds strange. It's like they are loosing their shape, but they aren't.
This is a great car for someone with kids."
Uh huh.
--Chris H.
mochi mochi on June 03, 2008 at 08:43 PM
Rusted-out 1972 Gran Torino wagon owners are great, but the Mildly-rusted 1973 Gran Torino wagon owners with their MiniVan-hating SUV-loving "My Torino has a smaller carbon-footprint that your Hybrid" attitude are just soooo unconscionably smug! They don't even care that their batteries are full of lead and sulphuric acid! Drop a 16ton Hummer on them all!!!! Simpering 1973 Torino retard morons!
Having set dark forces in motion, the minutes ticked by as Mochi Mochi watched to see if his evil plan to promote conflict around the Grand Torino would come to fruition. Will his twisted logic succeed in creating a massive flame-war. Will the dreaded combination of MiniVan, SUV, Hybrid, and "Smugness" produce a conflagration capable of melting blog-space worldwide? Will the forces of good shut down comments on the near inoperable 1972 Gran Torino ad? Tune in and see... Wait! what's that I hear in the distance, is it the sound of a MadDog stirring from his lair? Hmwhahhh hahhh hahhh... now the fun begins.
Brian on June 03, 2008 at 09:54 PM
A LAST FAST CAT. 1973 MERCURY COUGAR XR-7 / PRICE SLASHED - $3500 (Anchorage)
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/car/706949059.html
1973 Mercury Cougar XR7. 351 Cleveland New C6 Tran. Ford 9 inch Rear End. Sequintal turn Signal Tail Lights. Brand New Tires, Eagle Aluminum Wheels. Have all 4 XR7 Hub Caps. Excellent Suvivor Collectors Car. Call Gary 907-333-7143. Selling Part of my collection. Thank you for looking.
I like the beetle behind it? Naw this one is tops for all those biker-grannies out there.
Good Old Canoe - $245 (Anchorage)
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/spo/706948106.html
17 Ft Fiberglass Canoe. Has alot of miles on it but ready to use. Includes four canoe car top foams, three straps for tie down, and one aluminum/plastic paddle. If you would just like the canoe and no extras willing to sell for $215.
Oh hell yes I want canoe car top foams!!! Put a 5 Hp outboard under the hatch, put the canoe on the car top foams, and I'm gone.
mochi mochi on June 03, 2008 at 10:00 PM
I can't believe how much I want that cougar.
Brian on June 03, 2008 at 10:12 PM
Gary also has this piece of crap for sale:
1967 Chevelle SS 396 clone/PRICE SLASHED - $3500 (anchorage)
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/car/706937675.html
A dimond in the ruff. I have to many projects. This car has a New 010 4 bolt main 350. with a turbo 350 tranny. 10 bolt rearend. need to be finnished. Needs body work and paint. Car has open headers. This car fires and runs. It is a turn key operation. Has custem dash and gages. Have all super sport badges and turbo jet 396 badges, also 4 org. super sport hub caps. Contact Gary at 907-333-7143. Selling Part of my Collection. Thank you for looking. 3500. I keep wheels and tires.
Ahhh. What the hell man? What did you do to the paint job there? Can't imagine what else is ruined. Custom dash and guages? Is it a 'ricer?' Hub caps but not wheels or tires? Gary, you suck, dude.
dramaturge on June 03, 2008 at 10:19 PM
So....basically this is rust with some tires. Greeeeat. Just what I've been looking for....
Brian on June 03, 2008 at 10:24 PM
I'm really not Gary. It occurred to me though that there's a theme with Gary's 'collection.' I think he's actually selling off the whole thing, except possibly the VW. All the gas guzzling muscle cars are on their way out. And Gary wants a heck of a lot of cash for his unfinished beaters. For example:
1972 Dodge Charger - $5000 - $5000 (Anchorage)
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/car/705988804.html
1972 Dodge Charger 79335 miles. 318 2 berrel carb. 727 tork flight tranny. Car is in primer. (gray) Welded in quarter patch pannels. Car has hideaway headlights and swivel bucket seats. Will need paint,carpet,and headliner. Excellent Survivor Collectors Car. Selling part of my Collection. Contact Gary at 907-333-7143. Thank You for looking
This one would be worth the 5 Keys if he had finished the carpet and headliner. But why all the automatic transmissions?! Likewise, the Chevelle is probably worth the $3500 with at least a paint prep and wheels & tires.
Oh man he has a totally knackered 4-4-2!!
1967 OLDS CUTLAS 442 - $5000 (Anchorage)
http://anchorage.craigslist.org/car/703581189.html
67 olds Cutlas 442. Very restorable. This car run and drives. I have all the body parts to fix. This is a org. luvered hood car. Selling Part of my Collection. Contact Gary at 907-333-7143. Thank you for looking.
Got a thing for '67's eh Gary?
Mochi Mochi on June 03, 2008 at 11:11 PM
Next to the chevelle the canoe is looking pretty good. Take the engine out of the Chevelle and put it in the canoe. Man Gary's got all the cars in Anchorage.
David Colborne on June 03, 2008 at 11:29 PM
Great - make me check my car listings... let's see here:
http://reno.craigslist.org/car/706995544.html - 1979 Trans Am for sale by someone that does not know how to use punctuation grammar or sentence structure its a good price though seriously you should check it out...
http://reno.craigslist.org/car/706835312.html - Here we go... 1953 Jeep Pickup truck. May require assembly and removal of sagebrush from engine compartment.
http://reno.craigslist.org/car/706820599.html - Want a beater? Here's a '79 Cougar that's been sitting for three years, has faded paint on the hood, and is apparently equipped with a "351 windsor 2 baral in it with an auto tranz." C'mon, you know you want a piece of that.
http://reno.craigslist.org/car/706788346.html - The title for this says it all: "CAPRICE DONK CHEVY". Uh... whiskey? Tango? Foxtrot?
Mochi Mochi on June 03, 2008 at 11:46 PM
Donks? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot is right. And yeah I want some of that cougar (hah) - I think I liked Gary's better - look at the shock tower braces on the XR7! But Reno is a lot closer than Anchorage.
Regarding DONKS... apparently that's what I've been seeing on the streets of Oakland. These HighRider cars with GINORMOUS wheels are so messed up.. It's like Monster Truck meets Land Yacht. Here are some links:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lvGXT-W86Ns
http://www.lowridermagazine.com/features/0610_lrm_1975_chevrolet_caprice/index.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubGkCgXr-BY&feature=related
I'm thinking this could be a good mod for a Prius. There I said it - more irresponsible things to do to a Prius. Evil plan part 2.
Rob the SVX guy on June 04, 2008 at 06:34 AM
I'd like to see a prius in flat black, with something cool shoved in between the rear wheels. Maybe a boosted flat 6 from a porsche, or maybe an STi drivetrain. Something nuts. Maybe some dark bronze wheels with full race spec suspension and brakes. It'd be sweet.
Cookie the Dog's Owner on June 04, 2008 at 11:04 AM
Mochi, you are a *devious* individual. If we ever get to the same place at the same time, the drinks are on me.
Cookie the Dog's Owner on June 04, 2008 at 11:36 AM
Brian: "What's with all the automatic transmissions?" you ask. I've noticed a lot of ads for "street rod" type of vehicles lately where the ad describes the immense bad-ass V-8 in loving detail (all those carbs! all those barrels! those headers!), then notes that it's yoked to a "THM700" or some such. There seem to be a lot of them.
Examples:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Cars-Trucks___1947-Studebaker-Business-Coupe-lead-sled-custom-rod_W0QQitemZ270239965406QQddnZCarsQ20Q26Q20TrucksQQddiZ2282QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item270239965406&
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Cars-Trucks___SUPER-CLEAN-1967-CAMARO-EXTRAS-NITRO-FAST-LOOK_W0QQitemZ260247871415QQddnZCarsQ20Q26Q20TrucksQQddiZ2282QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item260247871415&
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Cars-Trucks___1966-chevelle-pro-street-drag-car-race-ready-bbc-427_W0QQitemZ170225317998QQddnZCarsQ20Q26Q20TrucksQQddiZ2282QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item170225317998&
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Cars-Trucks___1966-chevrolet-CHEVELLE-Super-Sport_W0QQitemZ330240050849QQddnZCarsQ20Q26Q20TrucksQQddiZ2282QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item330240050849&
What's the point of a hotted-up "pro-street" "lead sled" musclecar with a slushbox? Doesn't that kind of defeat the purpose of all that horsepower?
Rob the SVX guy on June 04, 2008 at 01:29 PM
You guys need to read up on musclecars. Generally, autos were the transmission of choice. They could hold a ton of power, and a lot of the time, they were faster, since they shifted less and the engines had a stupid large powerband anyway. Most drag cars of the 60s and 70s were autos.
Brian on June 04, 2008 at 02:55 PM
Rob, I did at one time own a 1970 Chevelle with a high-performance 327 engine and a TH-whatever automatic, and let me tell you, the auto tranny was the one thing that kept that car from being truly astonishing. Yes it was quick, had plenty of 'pop,' maybe could've done ok at the local drag strip. That high-revving engine is totally wasted on a slushbox, which hampered top speed quite a bit. It was still ok as a rather noisy & gas guzzling daily-driver, and damn reliable. But it could have been so much more.
Cookie the Dog's Owner on June 04, 2008 at 07:00 PM
On the other hand, there's this . . . uh . . . THING:
http://cgi.ebay.com/ebaymotors/Cars-Trucks___1987-Golden-Spirit-Zimmer_W0QQitemZ220242003877QQddnZCarsQ20Q26Q20TrucksQQddiZ2282QQcmdZViewItem?hash=item220242003877&
I think I'd rather have the '72 Torino wagon.
Mochi Mochi on June 04, 2008 at 10:35 PM
But Cookie TDO: don't you think the "THING" you found would be an excellent candidate for conversion to a Hybrid? When we drop the R32 engine into the Prius the batteries and incredibly complicated dual drive engine&motor system are left over. Put them in the "THING". You'd have a "unique" hybrid with none of the "smug" factor, and you would have a reduced carbon foot print - sort of...
I'm looking forward to that drink - thank you, it would be an honor.
Brian on June 04, 2008 at 10:42 PM
That's cool!
Theodore on June 05, 2008 at 05:19 AM
"This is a great car for someone with kids."
Especially kids you don't like.
Chris Hafner on June 05, 2008 at 10:10 AM
Oh, yes - the Zimmer. I remember Car & Driver had a Zimmer on the cover of an issue back in the late 1980s (1987?) and received basically a letter bomb from all of its readers. That car is embarrasment refined, purified, and put into automotive form.