Car Lust--2006 Audi S8

There's something about "V-10" that doesn't really roll off the lips. It just sounds wrong. V-8, V-12, V-6, straight six; all of these are common engine configurations with long histories of providing performance magic on the street.

But V-10? Outside of Formula 1, the V-10 doesn't have much history. In past years, there was the Dodge Viper, of course, and it was possible to find a Ford Super Duty pickup or van with a Triton V-10, but compared to other engine configurations, the pickings were a bit slim. After all, why put the money into tooling a V-10 when modern V-8s can pump out ridiculous amounts of power? And if you're hell-bent on cylinder count, why not move up to a V-12, with its innate smoothness, rich power band, and mellifluous tone?

Those were valid points until 2006, when the great horsepower arms race of the mid-2000s finally dictated mega-kiloton cylinder inflation. The new BMW M5 and its sibling, the M6, were first to the table, with wicked 500-horsepower V-10s. The 2006 Audi S8 didn't bring quite as much horsepower to the party, making do with a paltry 450 horsepower, and limping form 0-60 in a laggardly 5 seconds flat. For those dissatisfied with those numbers--I'm guessing a group made up of Michael Schumacher and former SR-71 pilots--at least the Audi S8 can claim the cachet of Lamborghini bloodlines.

This gives the S8 a dual personality. Dr. Jekyll is a large, understated, sumptuous luxury carriage with all of the requisite trinkets and baubles, able to glide silently down Rodeo Drive in class and style.

Mr. Hyde, on the other hand, is a snarling beast, ready to burst into violent acceleration with the slightest provocation. Consider this--the Audi S8 is incredibly comfortable, but can accelerate better than a Ferrari Testarossa or Lamborghini Countach.

Even Audi's curious recent horse-collar grille treatment and angry headlights look pretty good on the S8. The S8 still isn't quite as attractive as its 1998-2003 predecessor to my eyes, but while it's not a clean look, it is an exciting one.

The M5 is faster, but the S8's character dichotomy makes it a winner in my book. Brutally fast, yet stylish and opulent, the S8 speaks softly but carries a 10-cylinder stick. Its size and power make it in my mind a throwback to the ostentatious V-16 cruisers of the 1920s and 1930s that combined mass and streamlined force into the definition of the irresistible object. We spend a lot of time here rightfully adoring small efficient sportsters that excel at putting a smile on your face, so since this car is the complete opposite of that ethos, I don't expect it to be particularly popular. But its stern menace and power send a thrill up my Teutonic spine.

As always, VW/Audi can be counted on for some wildly over-the-top dramatic photography. I think this is as close as we're going to get in the 21st century to the classic moonscape advertising of the 1980s.

--Chris H.

Comments

[Steaming Pile on June 23, 2008 at 07:43 PM]

That ain't nothin'. Before the war, Cadillac had a V-16. It pumped out a whopping 175 HP. That was a rocket on wheels in the 1930s. Of course, this car was frickin' huge; it had to be to support two Buick straight 8's under the hood.

[Brian on June 23, 2008 at 08:05 PM]

I know of another car that can keep up with the Lambos and Ferraris you speak of, it ain't a Porsche. And I think you know what it is...

[Mochi Mochi on June 23, 2008 at 08:49 PM]

Chris, I totally get where you are coming from. And simultaneously reject the Audi S8. Not that my opinion matters to Audi or the people who are likely to purchase a car like this. You are completely right. This car is a Dr. Jekyll and Mr Hyde. It's perfect for "Rodeo Drive".

I know Rodeo Drive, and I hate Rodeo Drive. Its one of the worst places in LA. Its a slum of super affluence and a ghetto of conspicuous consumption. The lack of judgement that accompanies the purchase of excessively priced trinkets and baubles just does not speak well for the the Rodeo Drive buying population. Unfortunately this car would fit in perfectly right there. And that's why I hate this car.

It may be irrational but that's it. I know the Mr Hyde side of this car is great. But honestly this car is about money and status, even more than luxury or performance. It's rolling dollar signs (or euros).

I'm inclined to make suggestions like "this car should not be imported into the US, it should be left to European business executives as a company car." It's a great company car. But for private citizens? somehow, the people a car associates with, affects the way I view that car. People can tarnish a perfectly good car.

Now having said this I don't begrudge anyone a car like this. I think there are a lot of people who really want to have, and enjoy, the experience of driving a car that has this degree of luxury and performance. I don't think that all the drivers or admirers of this car are purely motivated by the status that accompanies it. I don't think all the people who want this car are going to waste $25000 on a leather jacket that they wear for one season. But let's face it. That's part of the allure to at least a portion of the demographic capable of buying this car. And when status becomes part of the equation then things get very mixed up. This car is definitely not "the people's car" (not that all cars have to be). But with increased expense there's an increasingly small and "elite" group for whom it is designed.

So there are sleepers - cars that have performance but don't look like it. There are cars like the pulsar that look "sporty" but don't deliver real performance. There are boring cars that are reliable appliances. There are road rockets that are about performance. But aside from the "performance cars" few of these cars are elitist in the essence of their design.

We all know that Porsches, and the like, are excessively expensive, but the design of the car is about performance. And you can buy a performance car for pretty cheap. You can pay more and get more performance. I just test drove a supercharged first generation MR2. That thing was a rocket with great handling. Based on the average price of a new car, most new car buyers could purchase one of these things used with out thinking about it. So many people can afford a performance car.

But here, with this Audi, we have a car that is designed to be elitist. It just bugs me. It's like making something thing that specifically thumbs its nose at those that don't have them. It's experience is completely internally focused, and offers nothing of satisfaction to the observer.

Performance cars can give back to the observer. If you're on the street and a Ferrari drives by you get the experience of the wonderful sound and the unique lines. Same thing if someone drives by in an old GTO with side pipes thundering. There's spectacle with great performance cars that (while it can be annoying) can be kind of thrilling and exotic. You see the car more than the driver. But not this Audi - it does not have an external experience that can bring pleasure to observers - it does not give anything back.

I appreciate the Audi's technology and the performance. But I hate it just the same.

[Nathan of Brainfertilizer Fame on June 24, 2008 at 07:04 AM]

The S8 (or maybe it actually was an A8, dunno) has been a Car Lust of mine since I watched the live-action cartoon called The Transporter II (never saw the first one).
Sure, it was ridiculous, and I don't expect any car can actually do the things he did in it...but the car looked really nice, and I'm sure it would be heaven to drive. And hell to fill up.

The S8 is one of any number of equivalent cars that I will always wistfully pine for: The VW Phaeton, a BMW 7-series, a nice Benz cruiser.
The reason I'm confident I will always wistfully pine for them, however, is that I'm equally certain I could never be rich enough to actually plunk that kind of money down for a car. There are other, cheaper cars that provide just as much (if not more) driving enjoyment for far less money.
And I think my previous posts should have made it absolutely crystal clear that I'm nothing if not a skinflint.

If nothing else, there's no reason not to go with an A/S-6, or maybe even an A-4, rather than the A/S-8.
They all look almost exactly the same, just in S, M, and L sizes. They are all luxurious. They are all excellent in handling.

In fact, I think I would take an Audi over an equivalent BMW at any level and almost any price point. Why? Because after years of chasing BMW, Audi has apparently made it a photo finish for driving enjoyment at the lower levels. It's close enough that it is just a matter of taste as to whether the A4 or 3-series is better, whether the S-6 is better than the M5 or not, whether you are happier with the A-6 or 5-series. And I'm just that little bit inclined to support the underdog, just enough to make me tilt towards Audi.

Plus, Audi/VW seem to be the best cars out there for retaining an outwardly new appearance. It's partly the quality of the paint, partly the saturation of the tint, partly the style of trim...and maybe flat-out good engineering, but Audi/VW cars always impress me with how fresh their paint jobs appear even years after purchase.

...and I'm rambling too much.

Anyway, I've been lusting after an Audi product for years now, and it's an itch I can't see myself ever scratching.

[Rob the SVX guy on June 24, 2008 at 07:08 AM]

Mochi: You nailed it. Exactly. Perfectly.

Chris, I understand why this car is great, but Mochi pointed out exactly why I hate it, better than I could have expressed it.

In fact... although I love new developments, for a lot of the same reasons I find myself disliking almost all new vehicles. They just don't have the personality that older cars do, and I think it's because of the people. Who BUYS a new car? Someone with a big bank account, or stupid enough to lose thousands of dollars almost instantly. Older cars require maintenance, love, knowledge, and effort. They 'require' someone to care for them, and I think that's entirely missing from a car like this. The person who owns this will not work on it themself, they will not understand it, they will not appreciate it. To them it'll be just another way to show off how much money they have.

[Ian on June 24, 2008 at 08:23 AM]

Nathan: "If nothing else, there's no reason not to go with an A/S-6, or maybe even an A-4, rather than the A/S-8.
They all look almost exactly the same, just in S, M, and L sizes. They are all luxurious. They are all excellent in handling."

Pretty close to what I was thinking. The S5 is just about exactly as fast, better looking (in my opinion), comes with a real transmission (sorry, I'm just not an auto person, even if it is Tiptronic), and costs about half as much. Maybe it's not as luxurious, but how nice does the interior need to be before it just becomes that Futurama bit: "It is just . . . the luxury edition has so much more eagle. It saddens me to think of you missing out."

I guess cars like the S8 will always be cars I admire but don't have much interest in. They're fast, they're good looking, but I think Mochi is right: "But honestly this car is about money and status, even more than luxury or performance." Even if I had the money, that isn't, to quote my friend's father, a club I want to join.

[Chris Hafner on June 24, 2008 at 08:59 AM]

You know what's funny? Back when I started this blog, I assumed that people would only like the obvious crowd pleasers, the expensive and flashy cars, and fling rotten fruit at me the other 85% of the time, when I write up the Subaru Justys and Citroen CXs of the world.

It's a bit funny that it's worked the other way around; I probably drove away the conventional car guys pretty early on!

[Steaming Pile on June 24, 2008 at 09:32 AM]

@Chris - It's like something I heard a preacher say once. It's easy to love the lovable. To love the unlovely, to see the inner beauty in something that is ugly as sin, takes character.

Also, talking about the obvious crowd pleasers is boring. Now, a discussion about the AMC Gremlin? That's fun. So is a flame war between SUV drivers and those who drive used subcompact cars. It's all fun and games until someone loses their posting privileges, but it's still fun.

[Rob the SVX guy on June 24, 2008 at 09:35 AM]

Speaking of which, an SUV cut me off the other day. It was a blonde woman about 30 years old on a cell phone. Instead of insulting her, or cutting her off, I just drove by and said "Hope you like those gas prices!"

Haha.

[Chris Hafner on June 24, 2008 at 09:45 AM]

Crap - I hate it when Typepad eats my comments.

So, here's a shorter, inferior version of the comment I just wrote.

I can totally see where you guys are coming from on this. As much as I like the S8, there's no way I'd buy it even if I could afford it. There are just too many neat things you could do with that kind of money, such as my preferred solution--buying roughly 40 1970s and 1980s beaters with peeling paint and blown turbochargers.

But I digress.

I also get the argument that the S8 is too much about money and status, and not enough about luxury or performance, and the fact that the S8 is tarnished by its likely driver demographic - people who either want to use it as a status symbol at their firm, or who want to preen to an adoring public. I agree with all of that stuff. Despite my oft-stated motto of not blaming a car for its drivers, I'd be less than human if I didn't get indignant about this thoroughbred of a car being wasted on many of its owners.

But ... it's not like the Audi S8 is only a status symbol. Unlike, say, the Lincoln Town Car of past decades, the S8 is also a hell of a car. It brings the goods. It's an athlete. I can be annoyed with, say, New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady dating a supermodel and being handsome and wearing finely tailored suits - and I am annoyed with him - but it's hard to argue with the fact that he's got it going on. That's how I feel about the Audi S8.

As much as my psyche is rooted in the 1970s and 1980s, I think new cars are terrific. I think we're in the midst of an incredible automotive golden age, and that we'll be discussing the S8 in hushed, reverent tones in 20 years as we're being driven in our electro-pods to our cranial download sessions by our robot overlords.

[Chris Hafner on June 24, 2008 at 09:47 AM]

Steaming Pile: "Also, talking about the obvious crowd pleasers is boring. Now, a discussion about the AMC Gremlin? That's fun."

I think there's probably something to that. I have to admit, this whole blog is a lot of fun for me. In a very selfish way, it's a handy archive of cars I like, and it's easy to keep great photos and videos in one place.

But deeper than that, it's fun to talk about cars that the rest of the Internet and car magazines haven't already hashed to death. Aside from (ahem!) the Audi S8.

[Chris Hafner on June 24, 2008 at 09:48 AM]

Rob the SVX Guy: "Speaking of which, an SUV cut me off the other day. It was a blonde woman about 30 years old on a cell phone. Instead of insulting her, or cutting her off, I just drove by and said "Hope you like those gas prices!""

That's probably the most painful insult of all right now. Here in Seattle, we've seen gas prices go up nearly every day. I tear up a little myself when I'm filling up. It's hard to believe it was only a decade ago that I was filling up the tank of my Celica with $0.79/gallon gas in North Carolina.

[Cookie the Dog's Owner on June 24, 2008 at 10:12 AM]

"I probably drove away the conventional car guys pretty early on!"

Actually, Chris, I don't think so. Cars are a lot of different things to different people. Your ride is a transportation appliance, but it could also be . . . a tool . . . an artifact of a particular time and place . . . an heirloom . . . a political or social statement . . . a work of art . . . a hobby . . . a plaything . . . and sometimes several of these all at once. For those of us who find cars interesting as a subject, I'd suspect that the "regulars" here at Car Lust (including you) are a representative sample. The automotive press tends to skew toward the new and the exotic because that's what sells magazines to a large audience, but enthusiasts seem (to me, anyway) to gravitate toward "interesting", however subjectively defined. New cars can be interesting, or not (hey, Camry, I'm lookin' at you!), but sometimes what makes them interesting isn't obvious until they've been around a while and maybe you've had a chance to monkey around in the engine bay and bolt on some new sway bars--which means that us pistonheads tend to gravitate toward older vehicles.

The other day, I was in the bike shop while my younger son's "ride" was getting a tune up. A group of guys including one of the store associates were having an animated discussion about which '89 Civic to get and what engine mods to do on it. It sounded like Mochi and Nathan and Rob and OCG in one of our discussion threads.

[Mochi Mochi on June 24, 2008 at 11:44 AM]

Great discussion one and all! I have to say Carlust has been a transforming experience for me. I've always loved cars and been prone to loving the interesting, the awkward, the cute, and the odd. But Chris's articles and the comments from all of you have opened my eyes and mind to new old car possibilities, ideas, and thinking. If CarLust can be a path toward enlightenment then I feel a little more enlightened by these discussions we've been having over the past year. Chris I don't think you've scared anyone away. I think instead the readership's thinking is being changed by the discourse.

Steaming Pile "something I heard a preacher say once. It's easy to love the lovable. To love the unlovely, to see the inner beauty in something that is ugly as sin, takes character." I love that quote and the sentiment behind it.

Chris: "I think we're in the midst of an incredible automotive golden age" I think you're probably right. And I really do like or have a lot of interest in new cars. I'm guessing that the real golden age is still coming. Taking the technology that we currently have and putting it into smaller more efficient cars - that's going to be amazing. I don't know when it's going to show up or how it will be in its final form, but the Honda CRZ sounds pretty nice right now.

Still there are losses along the way. I'd probably be a lot more inclined to buy a new car if it weren't for two things: Lack of visibility in modern cars, and too many computer controls. Mechanical systems are becoming a novelty. I find it strange that the tiny engine compartment of my 91 Si seems like a vast open plane in comparison to most new cars. I also like turning the wrench and knowing exactly what is happening inside my engine.

There are a lot of interesting new cars. While I have problems with styling trends that obscure vision, but 10 years from now these cars will have aged and become very interesting. Like a fine wine they will age and get even better. Buy one at the right time and you may have a classic in the making.

One of the things that this has all prompted me to do is look at cars that I almost forgot about, and consider the trends in ownership over the course of years. I would buy a new car if I found one that really did it for me. Rob points out that I would be losing a lot of money right off. But having studied trends in cars I now find that the ones that are oddly inspiring to me actually are worth more now than they were when new. If I bought a new car, I'd be holding onto it for 30 or 40 years and the care I would put into that car would be repaid in longevity and appreciation with time. Do you know what a single owner rust-free OEM 914 is going for these days. Do you know how much a pristine VW Squareback sells for? Way more than when it was purchased new. But honestly money is the least important part of old car ownership. When I have purchased new cars it was because I loved them. I wanted to keep them for ever. Now with the experience I have come to understand what that takes. If I saw "the right car" tomorrow I'd think about buying it. the SouthWest is a great place to keep a car for a long time. But right now I feel like I have "the right car" so I'm happy.

Since we are on the topic of Audi and new cars, I'd like to propose a Car Disgust candidate - the Audi TT. When I first saw this car, as a designer, it completely and utterly appealed to me. It was the perfect "designer's car". The form was beautiful and unique. From what I could tell it also had performance. When I saw one in person I realized that it was a tiny dark tomb utterly lacking in visibility or utility. Over the course of time I have grown to hate the TT. Where the S8 is about money and status, the TT is so much about "form", styling, and visual design that I am repulsed by the car - it feels like a strange sort of manipulation. I love it in a certain way and hate the fact that it manipulates my interest purely though "form" and styling. The more time that goes by the more I hate the TT. I may be the only person on earth who has this feeling, but I don't care. It is odd, it is quirky, to me it is beautiful, but in this case the car actually make me hate it.

[Chris Hafner on June 24, 2008 at 11:59 AM]

Mochi, my experience with the TT exactly parallels yours. When I first saw it, I was head-over-heels in love. When I first drove it, I was horrified by how much everything about the car had been sacrificed to the styling. You're spot-on with the visibility. It was just awful. I felt like I was driving a 1953 Hudson, but sitting directly on the floor. I was driving the hotted-up 3.2 version, too, but the experience inside the car ruined the whole experience for me.

I still think it's gorgeous, but I'll demur from owning one and will own a die-cast model instead.

[Nathan of Brainfertilizer Fame on June 25, 2008 at 05:49 AM]

@Chris,
"I still think it's gorgeous, but I'll demur from owning one and will own a die-cast model instead."
That's probably the only way I could ever own most of the cars we have been Lusting after.
I'm with you on the "I don't see myself ever buying an S8", because, as I said, I'm cheap. Every time I buy a car, I do search for the best car I can find for the money I have, but in the end, it is just a way to get you and yours from one place to another, and I'm practical enough to want to do it as efficiently and pleasantly as possible.
And that means paying 10-25% of an S8 price for 80% of its performance ability is always going to be a winning choice.

The nice part is that includes all sorts of used 626s, '94 Nissan Maxima SEs (when/if I get a chance at one), old CR-Xs, future used '05 Mazda 3s, et al.

Due to marriage, divorce, remarriage, and moving to and away from Hawaii twice over the last 7 years has resulted in many opportunities to buy used cars for me. I used to get a sick feeling in my stomach at the thought of having to go buy another used car. "Will I get ripped off?" But now I look forward to my next opportunity to buy a used car with character, and save the "will I get ripped off?" sick feeling for selling a car I've enjoyed for 2-3 years.

Question: what's the first thing you guys do when you get a used car?
For me, the first thing I do is install an mp3-capable CD player...

[Rob the SVX guy on June 25, 2008 at 09:58 AM]

I change the oil. Crawl around underneath it. Then I clean it a lot. But yeah, CD MP3 player for $50-100 is a great upgrade. Course... cars I buy are usually older, so the speaker surrounds are shot, so then I need some new speakers also.

After that, I go to junkyards to try to fix any little or broken tiny thing. :)

[Big Chris on June 27, 2008 at 04:17 PM]

Count me among the S8 lovers. But I want mine black. All black. Blacked out windows, stylin' black and chrome rims. Darth Vader on wheels.

Big Chris

[Chris Hafner on June 27, 2008 at 04:23 PM]

Big Chris: "But I want mine black. All black. Blacked out windows, stylin' black and chrome rims. Darth Vader on wheels."

Yes, that's it *exactly.*

[Steve on March 07, 2009 at 10:46 AM]

Audi has some impressive rides. S Line and Avant's are undoubtably increadable. These make great Family cars without the lack of style and performance. Especailly the wagon.